A friend of mine is studying in Italy, where (you’ll be shocked to learn) there are some cultural differences.

She just told me the story of the day she was running late to class, so she brought a modest breakfast along with her — a croissant and a small glass of milk.  This earned  her some strange stares during the lecture, and afterward a classmate approached her:

Classmate:  What were you drinking during class?

Her: Uhh… milk…

Classmate: (horrified)  Straight?!

On really rough days I take mine on the rocks with a twist.

This reminds me of my favorite scene in the musical Bye Bye Birdie, which we once performed in high school.  Young Hugo Peabody tries repeatedly to get a drink at Maude’s Roadside Retreat (where I portrayed Maude) but gets kicked out every time.  Later, he staggers out of the same bar completely drunk.  His mother is shocked:

Mrs. Macafee: Hugo Peabody, what have you been drinking?

Hugo:  Milk!  But it worked!

(For the record, I heard this story the day after seeing Sophie, who drinks over a liter of milk every day.  That just makes it funnier.)