Denver International Airport has a distinctive way of paging passengers on its concourses:
Mr. Smith, Mr. Charles Smith; Mr. Atkins, Mr. Derek Atkins; Mr. Sorkin, Mr. Aaron Sorkin – please dial zero on an airport courtesy telephone.
The familiar rhythm is oddly comforting.
Atlanta’s Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport also demonstrated a distinctive way of paging passengers during my layover there:
Charles Smith, please go to the nearest phone and dial 911 for a very important message.
I’m not sure how Charles Smith reacted, but I sure didn’t find it comforting.
Trouble seems to follow Mr. Smith, Mr. Charles Smith. From Denver to Atlanta. Next to New Orleans, where he gots the blues, the frequent flier blues.
“I get up in the morning,
Head out the airport.
They check my bag and shoes,
Then I sit down to wait.
I hear them call my name…
oh no, it’s bad news!
I got the blues
The frequent flier blues.
No matter how far I go
I got them frequent flier blues.”