I’m shopping for new eyeglasses (or perhaps just new lenses), and Cambridge EyeDoctors got my attention with the advertisement “$89 complete eyeglass package.” I naturally went straight to their website to look for locations.  There, I found the single best line ever written in the entire history of marketing.

Depending on your lifestyle, personal preference, and vision needs, you may want or need an additional pair of glasses. One pair should be used to provide vision correction while performing your primary activities. A second pair can be used to compliment or provide vision correction for other activities in which you participate.

Depending on your humor preferences, you may want to read a punchline after that quote.  The punchline could be constructed by assembling words in an order you’d find favorable.