Month: January 2012

Job Chart

As Sophie gets older we’re naturally expecting her to do more chores. She already cleans her own room and now also makes her own bed, does homework every night, and helps out around the house with tasks appropriate for her age. We’ve started seeing “Job Chart” or “Chore Chart” systems to help organize and reward these responsibilities, and so far they’re shockingly harmful ideas.

My Job Chart is the ultimate example, using high technology to solve the problem. Parents assign tasks via a website and award points for each task completed successfully. Children can then redeem those points through the website for parent-approved Amazon purchases, in-home treats, or family activities. This is a particularly advanced approach, but is structurally similar to what’s been done on paper for years: list the chores to be completed and list the rewards available for a job well done.

The entire idea (whether on paper or online) is fundamentally flawed.

First, individually rewarding specific behaviors encourages children to seek a reward for every behavior. Why help put away the Christmas decorations if the job doesn’t pay well enough? Plus, if each chore carries a reward, they all seem optional (“I don’t want a new toy this week so I won’t clean my room.”)

Second, much good behavior that deserves a reward doesn’t belong on a checklist. I recently saw a child Sophie’s age throw himself to the sidewalk screaming that he couldn’t get dinner from his favorite restaurant. I’m glad my daughter doesn’t behave that way (and told her so), but I would never have put “don’t throw a tantrum” on a checklist.

Finally, material rewards are… well, materialistic. Many systems encourage using “family rewards” instead — “spend time with Dad” and “read a bedtime story together” are popular suggestions — but that idea should be downright horrifying. We’re suggesting bedtime stories are conditional? If the child doesn’t finish her homework she doesn’t get time with Dad? “Sorry, honey; I can’t love you today. But if you clean your room tomorrow I’ll be able to love you for 30 whole minutes!” Worst of all, if both monetary and non-monetary rewards are available, the child can put a price on priceless activities. When twenty “points” buys either a $5 toy or a fun day with Dad, could she also buy an extra Dad day with $5 of her allowance? Would I have to charge extra for hugs?

These limitations do not translate to adulthood. We get rewards constantly (paychecks not least among them) but never with an itemized receipt for our behaviors. If I fail to vacuum the living room my wife will not automatically refuse to put away the dishes. If I do only the tasks assigned to me at work and never offer my own ideas I will be passed up for promotions and may even lose my job to a more “motivated” employee. Why would we create an artificial environment for our children that teaches them skills they can’t use as they mature?

Adults’ responsibilities are mandatory. We suffer consequences (e.g., unemployment or spousal fights) when we disregard them. Moreover, though, we expect the rewards we get. I did not earn the privilege of my wife cooking dinner yesterday, or any particular dollar of my paycheck last month.

We should offer the same expectations to our children for their own responsibilities. Sophie must clean her room; if she doesn’t, we’ll dispose of the mess. If she doesn’t eat a healthy dinner her supply of treats will run dry in a hurry. But bedtime stories are an every night event, and she gets “time with Dad” whenever either of us asks for it (not to mention “time with Mom” which doesn’t even make the cut for recommended Chore Chart rewards).

Let’s do our kids a favor and eliminate “Chore Charts” from the world.

Lost Card

From American Express:

If your Card is lost or stolen, we’ll replace it — sometimes in as little as 24 hours. Call American Express or visit one of over 2,200 American Express Travel Services locations worldwide. If you need assistance, call the number on the back of your card.

That number will be easy to find because I always have my card with me!

Wait… what?

Side Mirrors

Adjust Your Mirrors

Adjust Your Mirrors

The Society of Automotive Engineers recommends adjusting the side mirrors on your car so that there’s no overlap between what you see in the interior (“rear view”) mirror and in the wing mirrors.

I made this adjustment a couple months ago and I love it. For me, the goal isn’t to avoid ever looking over my shoulder. That seems unnecessarily lazy and still potentially dangerous. What I avoid is the need to check repeatedly.

When looking for a safe opportunity to change lanes, I may know there’s a car passing me but not know how far it’s come or whether there’s still enough room behind it for me to merge there. I’d end up checking over my shoulder several times (taking my eyes off the road for many seconds in total) before maneuvering. With this simple adjustment to the mirrors I can watch the traffic develop through my peripheral vision and only check over my shoulder as a final precaution when I’m actually ready to move my car.

Drivers, Ms. Daisy

A relative’s Dell XPS 8000 recently suffered a hard drive failure and had to be restored from backup onto a new drive. Naturally, it could no longer connect to the Internet.

Problem 1: The machine’s BIOS no longer recognized any USB keyboard that Dell didn’t create, and so wouldn’t boot with my keyboard in order to fix the problem. I had to borrow a Dell keyboard.

Problem 2: Windows did not have valid drivers for either the wireless or wired network cards. Dell distributes the drivers via its website, but without already having the drivers it’s impossible to connect to the Internet. I had to download them from my iMac, burn a DVD, and load them from DVD on the PC.

Problem 3: When given the “Service Tag” for this machine, supposedly identifying the specific machine so Dell can provide the correct drivers, Dell provides 64 bit drivers which are completely incompatible with the 32 bit processor. This one was a doozy. I had to ask Google to find every possible driver for any model Broadcom NIC and then try them all until one worked.

Just for a little comparison, my own iMac suffered a hard drive failure last year. Apple installed a new drive, I restored from Time Machine, and it was like nothing had ever happened.

I don’t mean to insight a religious Mac vs. PC debate, and in fact Apple does plenty of stuff I dislike, but that much effort to connect to the Internet (via a wired connection, no less) is just ridiculous.

Just Like the Movies

Like most Americans, I sat glued to the television screen in the aftermath of the terrorist attacks on September 11, 2001. The most vivid clip I remember showed a group of pedestrians fleeing down a Manhattan street as a cloud of dust closed in behind them.

My immediate thought was: “Those special effects are so fake!”

Having never seen a building actually collapse upon a city full of people before, the only way my mind knew how to judge the event was against special effects from fiction depicting alien attacks and super-earthquakes. Against that yardstick, they looked at once both unreal and more terrifying.

Michal Kosakowski created a short film called Just Like the Movies that depicts the September 11 attacks using scenes from films.  Some of the clips feature alien ships and other obvious anachronisms, but the timeline of events and the overall visual recall dramatically what really happened that day.