I Believe Two Things » Overheard http://blog.benjaminfenster.com A Blog of Musings and Mockery Sat, 04 Feb 2012 13:58:30 +0000 en hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.1 Healthy Relationship http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/02/healthy-relationship/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/02/healthy-relationship/#comments Fri, 03 Feb 2012 03:44:57 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=2346 At the grocery store:

Dude, you should go out with her. You’re the only person I know who doesn’t want to punch her in the face.

 

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/02/healthy-relationship/feed/ 0 Homeworkagon http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/homeworkagon/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/homeworkagon/#comments Sun, 29 Jan 2012 02:51:20 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=2342 From an online discussion pertaining to today’s middle school geometry homework:

I can’t seem to draw anything that ends in “agon”

I assume that means the assorted “angle” and “ircle” shapes proved easier.

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/homeworkagon/feed/ 0 Quod Erat Demonstrandum http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/quod-erat-demonstrandum/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/quod-erat-demonstrandum/#comments Thu, 26 Jan 2012 13:50:47 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=2317 As a second grade class filed into the cafeteria at Sophie’s school, I heard the tail end of this conversation:

Kid: See? I told you I could prove I don’t like you!

I’m glad they’re teaching the scientific method!

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2012/01/quod-erat-demonstrandum/feed/ 0 No Tests http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2011/09/no-tests/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2011/09/no-tests/#comments Sat, 03 Sep 2011 12:52:09 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=2084 Overheard from a child about nine years old:

I’m never going to drive a car because I’m never going to take the test. I don’t like tests. … Except the tests we take at schol; I like those.

I guess my main question is: what other tests have you been taking?

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2011/09/no-tests/feed/ 1 The Dollar Store http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2011/05/the-dollar-store/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2011/05/the-dollar-store/#comments Sat, 21 May 2011 04:03:02 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=2019 Overheard at the Dollar Tree:

Employee: (to manager) I’m going to need some ones.

Really? That isn’t the sort of problem that’ll just sort itself out if you let a couple more people checkout? Ya know… ’cause it’s the dollar store?

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Some Girl: Walk away, Chris. They’re naked.

What some of you may already know is that telling a teenage boy that there are naked girls nearby virtually guarantees that he won’t walk away. In fact, I’m half surprised the pair didn’t immediately repel down a ventilation duct from the roof just to get around the blockaded entryway.

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2010/11/walk-away-from-the-nakedness/feed/ 1 The New Economy http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2010/11/the-new-economy/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2010/11/the-new-economy/#comments Mon, 08 Nov 2010 15:34:11 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=1820 Overheard:

Non-Parent Adult: If you want to get that, it will cost $25.

12-Year-Old: Are you serious? That’s two allowances plus a full report card of A’s!

I wish my life worked like that. “Hi, I’ll have a grande mocha and a classic coffee cake, please. Here’s my report card with one A and a C to cover the cost.”

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2010/11/the-new-economy/feed/ 1 In the Language of an Infant http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/12/in-the-language-of-an-infant/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/12/in-the-language-of-an-infant/#comments Mon, 07 Dec 2009 15:04:42 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=1368 A colleague just returned to work today after the birth of his son. He described the process of learning what different cries mean:

It’s like learning a new language while sleep deprived and while the person teaching it to you is yelling at you.

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/12/in-the-language-of-an-infant/feed/ 1 Benefits of Retirement http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/11/benefits-of-retirement/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/11/benefits-of-retirement/#comments Fri, 13 Nov 2009 14:07:36 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=1338 Overheard in the office:

About-to-Retire Staff Member: Are they serving alcohol?

]]> http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/11/benefits-of-retirement/feed/ 1 So, To Sum Up… http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/11/so-to-sum-up/ http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/2009/11/so-to-sum-up/#comments Thu, 12 Nov 2009 21:03:50 +0000 Ben http://blog.benjaminfenster.com/?p=1335 Conversation at work today:

Colleague:  I have stories to tell about Cleveland!
Me: Does it rock?
Colleague: It does not.

That about covers it.

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