On my way onto my Northwest Airlines flight to Phoenix on Friday, I passed a row of small, screaming children, who were having a heated argument with their parents about (I hope) which toys they were allowed to have while the plane sat at the gate. All I heard as I walked by was:

Kid #1: I want to see the snake!
Kid #2: It’s not a snake! It’s not a snake! It’s not a snake!

Somebody get those monkey-fighting snakes off this Monday-to-Friday plane!

(That, for the record, would be Samuel L. Jackson’s line from Snakes on a Plane as aired on television, according to the Internet Movie Database.)